This week has been hard on me. Let me give you an example. Tonight I got up to go to the bathroom and I fell to my knees in pain from a muscle spasm. I try to keep the kids in the dark about my ms but i could do nothing tonight.

This has been a hard weekend. But today is painful. There is a ball of fire in my right thigh. To top that, I have a very painful knot in my right shoulder blade. Lucky me.

I've had a hard day. Something concerning us my right hand and pinky finger is going numb. That's weird.

This weekend was rough. If I can just make it until November.

I  have figured out that there are good and bad things about Joe being home. He is stressing me out! The stress is bad for me. My head still hurts and my right hip is starting to make it unbearable to sleep at night. I know that I need medication for the pain but this is unreal!

My hip has been killing me. The rest of the pain i can deal with today.

Today is very rough for me. I woke up off and on from my legs having spasms. I was dealing with the screaming and whatnot but since the neighbors kid came over, she is causing the kids to scream and yell more. My head hurts in one spot and it is affecting my vision in my left eye.

Well to make matters worse, Kaylee my grand daughter, wrapped a robe around her neck and if i would not have reacted fast then she could have died. As you know, that sends a person's body with MS in shock. I'm light headed and my body is electrified with pain. I'm just glad she is going to be okay.

I didn't sleep last night. The pain in my right hip and thigh kept me up. I just want to stay in bed for the rest of the day but I have to go to work and help Joy. I have to force myself to keep going and there are times I want to scream out "I have MS!" Please let me just hibernate. I am just having a pity party.

My back is killing me and my legs and hips are screaming in pain. And even though I could get sick I held my daughter until she fell asleep. My daughter is running a fever.

I did not sleep well last night. I'm worried about my son and money. This junk in my throat gets worse when i am stressed. My head is hurting still. I need some serious drugs to get rid of this headache!

Right now the spot above my left ear is hurting and tingling. I am having blurry vision in my left eye and it is leaking. My left cheek feels weird and numb. When we get insurance back, I need to go get this checked.

I can not believe how hot it is today.  I hate sweating. I am in some pain today. Getting stressed did not help. that is when the pain started. I wish people could get along and stop this crazy petty stuff. My head is killing me also.

Last night I took too many sleeping pills. I did sleep though. Right now I'm having pain like tons of ants singing my left foot. No matter how I move it. It still hurts. Ouch!

I took my shower. It takes a while to sike myself up to get in the water. The water coming down like acid rain and the water is never the right temp. I am just glad that is over. My MS is actually doing good today. No real complaint, just the regular aches and pains. My jawbone hurts. but that is partly my fault. I cut the skin of the bone.

Tonight my skin is crawling. When Emily touched me I almost came unglued. It felt like her touch burned my skin. This happens quite a lot to me. I'm lucky that my husband understands.

I hate asking the kids to bring me stuff but the fatigue is worse today because I didn't get any sleep. It is hard to do things today. I'm so grateful for Mikayla. She doesn't even realize how bad I feel physically. I just want to sleep.

There is serious pain in my right thigh. And pins and needless in my foot. There are times I just don't want to go on.

Today was not to bad. There is the "junk" in my throat. The more I try to swallow the more seems to come back. Oh well. My nerve endings seem to be on high alert. This is not a bad day though.

I'm so glad that my MS friends can read my blog and I can read yours. It has helped me a great deal to know that I'm not crazy or imagining things.

It hurts to lay down, it hurts to sit down and it hurts my legs to stand. I sure love MS

This morning I knew I was in trouble. As soon as Rob went to hug me goodbye, my skin started hurting. That is one of the bad things about this disease. I have been having blurry vision  for the last 16 hours in my left eye. I am hoping that it goes away.

I started the day feeling somewhat tired. But that is not unusual for me. for the last two hours I feel like I am  sandwiched in between two magents and i can not move a muscle. Its hard to explain the feelling of being so tired that going to the bathroom excerts you.

Outside of lying down and letting it run its course, I haven’t found too many useful ways to deal with that fatigue. I’m typically one to push through illness; I try to work out almost every day, even when I have a cold or a mild digestive problem. And to be sure, sometimes getting out and getting moving combats my MS fatigue. But not always.

My partner not only has to imagine what it’s like each day for me to deal with pins and needles, numbness, shooting pain, aching, dizziness, nausea, and overwhelming fatigue, but he also has to live with the same uncertainty of waking up each day and not knowing if we can do the things that we had planned. he is the only one that truly understands how I can look so good on the outside and feel so miserable on the inside. He gets it when I have to cancel plans because I did too much the day before.

Thanks to MS, I’ve learned to truly take one day at a time. I wake up grateful for each day that I can walk, but I also wake up grateful that I have someone in my life that will stand by me no matter what. It would do us all good if we remembered to let our significant others know how much we appreciate all that they have done for us by sharing in living with the uncertainty of life with MS.

Being diagnosed with a label that carries so many connotations means you are often met with “that look”.  You know the look, the one that screams pity.  Well my dogs don’t feel sorry for me, they don’t get angry with me when I have mood swings or forget things.   They don’t judge me if I lie on the sofa all day, they just burrow under the blanket and join me.  If I’m sad and a tear falls from my cheek, one of them will rest their head on my shoulder or their paw on my lap, no words are spoken but comfort surrounds me.  It doesn’t matter what I can or cannot do, my dogs are always there, just happy to be with me.  I believe that kind of love is known as unconditional.

I start back to college today. I'm so nervous that my shoulders are tense and hurting. I didn't sleep last night, so I know that means trouble for me. This darn pain above my left ear hurts. Going on 2 months. I don't want lesions!

My daughter Mikayla is nervous going into high school. I didn't want her to see how nervous I am. I feel like throwing up. Not a cool mom now!

My shoulder is killing me. I don't know if it is the MS or the diabetes or just getting old. lol. I just hope this day is over soon. I have had a great day so far except for the throbbing pain above my left ear. I feel like i can feel the blood rushing through that spot. My left eye is twitching but I have tried to keep my glasses on hoping that it helps.

I couldn't sleep last night. My head was hurting. No not a headache. I had cold chill bumps that hurt when touched. Today I'm taking Emily shopping and it's burning up in these stores. People are way to close to me. I feel like I can't breathe.

Today is a new day! I woke up refreshed and feeling good. Please dear God let it last. I did need my glasses right away. Anyway I'm on my way to work.

Ok, so things were not to bad today. I did not like the wind blowing. It felt like the wind was cutting through me like a knife. Just part of the game I guess. I am amping myself up to take a shower. The water has to be just right. not to cold and not too hot. Most of the time the shower feels like acid raining down on me.

My Right thigh is tremoring and hurting. I hate muscle spasms. and my right hip is hurting but not to bad.

I was going to go to work today until I stepped outside. The rain felt like pellets my friend use to shoot at me when we were young. Its hard to explain the sense of dread when my MS takes over. I crawled into bed thinking I could sleep but the chills had taken hold of me.  The cover moving against my skin was like sandpaper grinding against me. I hope my boss understands tomorrow but you never know. The stress of my boss, the bills, the supplies for school and then my son begging to come home after three days is just more than my body could take. I hope for a better day tomorrow.